I was raised on America’s Most Wanted and Law & Order. So I approach all life situations carefully considering the odds of my getting kidnapped, raped, and/or murdered to an arguably (and admittedly) irrational degree. I don’t mind telling you that I am scared of the country. Even the suburbs…Continue reading A Walk to Remember
Common Courtesy is Dead
Common courtesy has died a horrible death and common decency is on life support. If I ever become President, I will mandate that everyone, I don’t care who your dad is, EVERYONE will be required to spend at least six months working in either a restaurant or in retail. I…Continue reading Common Courtesy is Dead
Baby Showers Bum Me Out
Baby showers bum me out. I get bummed out because as I sit there I know that, more than likely, that will never be me. I have that thought not for the reasons you might think. I actually don’t want kids. At least not now and not in the foreseeable…Continue reading Baby Showers Bum Me Out
Summer in the City
I love summer and all that it stands for, in theory. I love the spirit of summer, the break from school, the freedom that comes with warmer weather, being outside. The sun, the fun. All good stuff. It’s the practicality and reality of summer that bums me out. That from…Continue reading Summer in the City
Hey, Remember That Time I Met Mark Wahlberg?
I had graduated from Drexel University with a Master’s Degree in Interior Design with no job offers and no job leads. I was working as a hostess at two high end restaurants in Philadelphia. One of those restaurants was the steak house chain, Smith & Wollensky’s. Summer being their slow season, there…Continue reading Hey, Remember That Time I Met Mark Wahlberg?
Summer of ’05: Part II
As I mentioned last time, I worked my face off that summer. I once worked a whopping 22 shifts straight before taking a day off. I was working as a hostess in a restaurant that was, at the time, one of THE most popular places in Philadelphia. How popular, you…Continue reading Summer of ’05: Part II
Summer of ’05: Part I
As we enter into the home stretch of summer time, I think now is as good a time as any to tell you some tales from one of the stranger summers of my adult life. The summer of 2005 was a weird one. I’d graduated from Drexel with my Masters,…Continue reading Summer of ’05: Part I
I Can Fit My Whole Foot in My Mouth
When you think of sexual harassment, what comes to mind? Clarence Thomas? That episode of Quantum Leap where Sam was Dr. Ruth and ran into Anita Hill? Mad Men? That episode of Quantum Leap that was kind of like Mad Men? Maybe a Lifetime original movie about some young woman…Continue reading I Can Fit My Whole Foot in My Mouth
Today is an Important Day
Today is an important day. I have given it a lot of thought, and I’ve decided to take an early retirement. Today, I am retiring. You’re confused, understandably. So I’ll explain. But where to begin… I guess I’ll start in Harrisburg, PA. I moved to Harrisburg about six months after…Continue reading Today is an Important Day
No, You’re Right. I’m the Worst.
One of my biggest fears is being publicly shamed. Specifically, to be scolded in public as an adult for doing something that I shouldn’t be doing. I live my adult life just trying not to get yelled at. But since my life typically plays out like a sitcom or romantic…Continue reading No, You’re Right. I’m the Worst.